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老友记全10季剧本-中英对照分集版[DOC格式]
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大家好，我是Peter，2010年我开始自学网站制作，本站为处女作。4年了，得到广大老友迷的鼓励与支持，上周开始用心地更新这个老网站，同时尝试给大家带来免费的老友记视频高速下载网址。
老友记第1季第1集：
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老友记第七季第7集中英文对照剧本
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707 The One With Ross&s Book
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is eating breakfast as Rachel enters having just woken up.]
Joey: Morning!
Rachel: Hi! Oh, how was your date last night?
Joey: Pretty good.
Rachel: Oh good. (She walks to the closed bathroom door, opens it, and finds a naked woman wrapped in a towel.) Ahhh! My God, sorry! (She closes the door and confronts Joey.)
Joey: Okay, really good. Anyway I I&m late for work.
Rachel: What-what?! You&re gonna leave this person with me?!
Joey: Yeah&Hey, don&t worry, she&s a terrific girl. And hey listen, could you do me a favor? When she comes out could you just mention that I&m not looking for a
that&d be great.
Rachel: Why?! What?! Are you kidding?!
Joey: Just casually slip it in, y&know lay the groundwork. Tell her uh, I&m a loner&No! An outlaw! Tell her she doesn&t want to get mixed up with the likes of me.
Rachel: Y&know what? That&s a lot to remember, can&t I just tell her you&re a pig?
Joey: Hey, I&m gonna call her later! Honest! Oh come on, Chandler used to do it! He&d even make the girl pancakes! Plus, he&d make extras and leave &em for me.
Rachel: Well forget it, I&m not telling that girl anything. That is not my responsibility.
Joey: Fine! (Pause) Now, where&d we land on those pancakes? (She chases him out the door as his date emerges from the bathroom.)
Joey&s Date: Hi!
Rachel: Hi.
Joey&s Date: Sorry about that, but I couldn&t get that lock to work on the door.
Rachel: Yeah, Joey kinda disabled it when I moved in.
Joey&s Date: You must be Rachel, I&m Erin.
Rachel: Hi.
Erin: Hi. I don&t mean this to sound like high school, but did he say anything about me?
Rachel: (pause) Would you like some pancakes?
Opening Credits
[Scene: N.Y.U&s University Library, Ross is entering with Chandler.]
Chandler: &Come on! Why are we here?!
Ross: Okay, okay take a guess.
(An old woman pushes a cart full of books past.)
Chandler: The hot chicks?
Ross: Okay, okay, I was typing names into the library computer earlier, y&know-y&know for fun, and I typed mine in and guess what came up? My doctoral dissertation! It&s here! Yeah, it&s right-it&s right down here! In the biggest library in the university! (They start heading that way, towards a secluded section behind the racks.)
Chandler: Wow that&s actually pretty cool.
Ross: (stopping quickly) Oh umm, there&s also a book here by a woman named Wendy Bagina. (They both laugh, but stop when the hear moaning coming from the next aisle.) What is that?
Chandler: Sounds like two people are really enjoying the Dewey decimal system.
(They go around the last row of bookshelves and find a couple doing what college coeds do in secluded corners of university libraries. For those of you who don&t know what I&m talking about, let&s just say that clothing is undone. Ross gasps and the couple gets up and runs away.)
Female Student: (as they are moving past Ross) I&m so sorry!
Male Student: Sorry!
Chandler: You didn&t bring me here to do that, did you?
[Scene: Monica&s Restaurant Kitchen, Monica is cooking as a waitress enters carrying a plate of food that has been sent back.]
Monica: She sent the chicken back again?!
The Waitress: She says it&s to dry now and she wants to come back here and explain to you exactly how she wants it.
Monica: Well fine! I want to meet this chicken expert! Send the Colonel in!
(The waitress lets her in as Monica is about to throw a lobster into a pot of boiling water (Although, she hasn&t taken off the rubber bands that hold the claws, so she can&t be that good of a chef). Anyway, guess who the Colonel is by the following phrase.)
The Colonel: OH&MY&GAWD!!!! (Yep, it&s Janice.)
Monica: (to the lobster) Lucky bastard! (Throws the lobster in and turns around to face the planet&s most annoying woman, next to Dr. Laura and Kathy Lee Gifford of course. She&s the most annoying female TV character however.) Janice.
Janice: How are you Ms. Hot Shot chef with the big fancy restaurant with the best chicken ever! (Does the laugh.)
Monica: I&m fine.
Janice: (notices Monica&s engagement ring) Ohh! What is that on your finger?! I&m blind!
Monica: Oh& Uh&
Janice: So, who&s the lucky guy?
[Cut to Monica and Chandler&s just after Monica has finished telling Chandler what happened.]
Chandler: OH&MY&GAWD! I am so sorry sweetie, are you okay? You didn&t tell her we were getting married, did you?
Monica: Well, she saw the ring.
Chandler: Did she freak out?
Monica: Well, she was shocked when I told her, but then again so were most people.
Chandler: Right.
Monica: Well, she actually has a boyfriend y&know herself, named Clark. Uh, she also kinda invited herself to our wedding. Clark too.
Chandler: (laughs) You said no right?
Monica: Huh?
Chandler: You said no right?!
Monica: Well, she corned me! She asked if the wedding was in town! I mean, what was I supposed to do?!
Chandler: Lie!!! How hard is that?! The check&s in the mail! Oh your baby is so cute! I can&t wait to read your book Ross!!
Monica: Come on! So she comes to the wedding! I mean it won&t be so bad.
Chandler: What do you think she&s just gonna sit there quietly? You don&t think she&s gonna want to make a toast? You don&t think she&s gonna want to grab the microphone and sing Part-time Lover?!
Monica: Oh my God, she&s not gonna like the chicken that night either is she?!
Chandler: Y&know what? It&s gonna be okay. Y&know what? She&s probably not gonna even want to come.
Monica: Really?
Chandler: No! That was a lie! See how easy that was?
Monica: So-so you would&ve just lied?
Chandler: Yes!!
Monica: Would it really have been that easy?
Chandler: Yes!!!
Monica: Good, so do it Saturday night because we&re going to dinner with her and Clark.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is coming back from work to find Phoebe, Rachel, and someone else with her back turned is there.]
Joey: Hey! What&s up?
Phoebe and Rachel: Hey!
Joey: Hey-hey, who&s your friend? (Erin turns around to face Joey, startling him) Hey!!
Erin: Hey Joey!
Joey: Erin! Still here!
Rachel: Yeah, we ended up spending the day together and had such a great time!
Joey: Why wouldn&t ya? Erin is great! Then-then there&s you guys.
Erin: Ohh, listen. I&ve got to get going. Today was great, thanks!
Rachel: I know!
Phoebe: Okay!
Erin: Bye Joey. (Kisses him.) Last night was fun.
Joey: Yeah. I&ll uh, I&ll call ya.
Rachel: Oh and I&ll call ya too!
Erin: Or I&ll call you!
Phoebe: And call me!
Joey: (to Erin) Okay, good to see you again.
Erin: Bye.
Joey: Bye-bye.
Rachel: Bye!
(Joey closes the door behind her.)
Joey: So, system kinda broke down huh?!
Rachel: Oh Joey, I&m sorry I just couldn&t tell her all those things you wanted me to tell her. And y&know we got to talking and I&
Phoebe: We want you to marry her!
Joey: What?!!
Phoebe: She is so amazing! You have no idea.
Joey: No idea? Who do you think brought her here?
Rachel: Cupid.
Phoebe: Joey, she&s so cool. She speaks four languages.
Joey: Man, do you know what guys want!
Rachel: Look Joey, come on she&s so perfect for you! I mean she&s sweet, she-she likes baseball, and she-she had two beers at lunch.
Joey: My beers?! Look you guys, she&s a very nice girl. Okay? We had a good time, but I just&I don&t see it going anywhere.
Phoebe: Yeah, but you always say that.
Rachel: Yeah, maybe if you gave this girl a chance it would go somewhere.
Joey: Look I&m sorry you guys, I-I just don&t think so.
Phoebe: Whatever.
Rachel: Fine. (They start to walk away.)
Joey: Hey, don&t start judging me! (To Rachel) Huh? You&re the one who&s in love with her assistant! (To Phoebe) Huh? And you, you&re the one having the affair with the guy who keeps the pigeons on the roof!
Rachel: Phoebe!
Phoebe: Secret affair!
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel and Joey are there as Ross enters.]
Ross: People are doing it in front of my book!
Rachel: I&m sorry?
Ross: My doctoral dissertation is in the library at school, I went to see it, and there were students makin& babies right in the middle of the Paleontology section!
Rachel: Oh my God! Did you get to see anything good?
Ross: Let me ask you something, at your school was there a like uh a place on campus where students went to uh, fool around.
Rachel: Yeah, there was. It was&there the corner of the library where-where all these dusty books that nobody ever read&Yes, there was.
Ross: Great! Because people kept showing up, I think it&s like uh-a thing!
Joey: Now hold on a second, fifth floor against that back wall?
Ross: Oh for cryin& out loud! (He storms out.)
Joey: All right, so we should go catch our movie.
Rachel: Well now what&s the rush?
Joey: I like to see the previews. (Rachel looks at him.) The candy.
Phoebe: (entering with Erin) Oh. Hey!
Rachel: Well look who&s here!
Erin: Hey!
Joey: Hey!
Erin: Joey.
Joey: Erin.
Erin: Hey Rachel.
Rachel: Hi! Well, we were just about to take off and see a movie. Oh no!
Erin: What&s wrong?
Rachel: Oh Phoebe, we forgot that party we have to go to.
Phoebe: Oh no.
Joey: (skeptical) What party?
Phoebe and Rachel: A birthday party.
Joey: Who&s birthday party?
Phoebe and Rachel: Allison&s birthday party.
Joey: (still skeptical) Oh, and how is Allison?
Phoebe and Rachel: 32. (Joey&s not buying it.)
Rachel: (does a retching sound) Wait a minute! Why don&t you guys do something?!
Joey: (still skeptical) Yeah, look how that worked out.
Commercial Break
[Scene: The Library, Ross enters and heads to the desk to talk to the male librarian on duty.]
Ross: Excuse me. Hi, I&m a professor here. Do you know the Paleontology section, fifth floor, stack 437?
The Librarian: Well, yes! Just give me five minutes, I just have to find someone to cover my shift.
Ross: No! No!! No! Can I speak to someone in charge please?! (The librarian brings his boss over.)
The Head Librarian: How can I help you?
Ross: Hi, I was wondering if it is possible to increase security in the Paleontology section? See I-I wrote a book up there and instead of reading it people are-are-are well, rolling around in front of it.
The Head Librarian: We are aware of the problem you are referring too. (He turns to look at the previous librarian.) But as far as increasing security, I&m afraid the library is very understaffed. I, I can&t help you.
Ross: Well, fine. Fine! If-if I&m the only person with any appreciation of the sanctity of the written word, I&ll go up there and defend it myself! (Starts to do so, but stops and to the previous librarian) And don&t you follow me!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Phoebe are doing dishes as Joey enters.]
Joey: Hey.
Phoebe: Hey!
Rachel: How did it go with Erin?
Joey: Oh, unbelievable! We had the best time!
Phoebe: Yay!! Oh so, you&re not, you&re not mad at us anymore?
Joey: No! No! No! You guys were totally right! This is so much better than the first time we went out. Y&know? That was so awkward, we were really nervous.
Phoebe: Didn&t you sleep together?
Joey: Yeah that really calms me down. And! We have so much in common! She loves sandwiches, sports, although she is a Met fan, not much of an issue now but if were ever to have kids, well that&s a&
Rachel: (gasps) Oh my God! Listen to you talkin& about having kids. Oh my Joey. (She goes over and hugs him.) Oh, please don&t get married before I do.
Joey: Okay.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Chandler are on their date with Janice and Clark, however Clark is a no show and Janice is crying the Mississippi River about it.]
Janice: Oh. Oh I just cannot believe Clark stood me up!
Monica: He might still show up.
Janice: Oh, what are you, stupid? It&s been three hours.
Monica: Is that all?
Janice: I should just go on to happier things, okay? Umm, why don&t you tell about your lovely wedding?
Chandler: Well actually uh, there was something we wanted to tell you about the wedding. Um, it&s going to be a small ceremony. Uh, tiny! We&re not even sure why we&re having it.
Monica: It&s actually going to be just family.
Janice: Oh&wait&you two think of me as family?! Oh, I have to ask you somethi do you want me to sing Careless Whisper or Lady In Red?
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is entering and arguing baseball with Erin. Phoebe and Rachel are already there.]
Joey: How can you say that?! The Mets have no closer!
Erin: What about Benitez?
Joey: What about Game 1 of the Series?
Erin: What about shut up?
Joey: You shut up! (To Phoebe and Rachel) I love arguing with her. (To Erin) I&ll be right back.
Erin: Okay. (Joey goes to get some coffee and Erin sits down.)
Rachel: So how&s it goin& with Joey?
Erin: Uh, okay.
Rachel: Okay? Wait okay, tell-tell me that you like him, please? I mean tell me that you like him.
Erin: Look, he&s a really great guy and I know that you really want this to work out, but I just don&t see this having a future.
Rachel: But you said that you liked him! I mean what happened?! Did ya just change your mind?!
Erin: Kinda.
Phoebe: Then change it back!
Erin: I&m sorry I& It&s just there&s no real spark.
Phoebe: No spark? Didn&t you sleep together?
Erin: Yeah.
Rachel: Ugh, tramp!
Phoebe: Does Joey have any idea?
Erin: I really don&t think he does. And y&know what? Maybe you guys could help clue him in. Y&know, tell him I&m-I&m not interested in a serious relationship or something.
Phoebe: Yeah, you mean like that you&re kind of a loner.
Erin: Yeah! That would be great!
Phoebe: Yeah, and maybe that you&re a real (She says something in Italian, and it doesn&t matter what she said. It&s not important so I don&t need everyone who speaks Italian telling me what she said.)
Erin: I&m sorry?
Phoebe: Oh well, I guess Italian isn&t one of the four languages you speak.
Joey: (returning) Hey! You wanna go?
Erin: Yeah, let&s go.
Joey: Okay. See you guys later.
Erin: Bye guys.
Rachel: Yeah, see ya.
Joey: (whispers to Phoebe and Rachel) Hey, thank you so much. (They both exit.)
Rachel: Wow. Well, I guess it was Cupid who brought her here.
Phoebe: No, just a regular old flying dwarf.
[Scene: The library&s Paleontology section, Ross is patrolling as a couple walks up.]
Ross: Yes? Yes?! How can I help you?
Guy: Yeah, we were&we were just looking around.
Ross: Oh-oh, you&re-you&re fellow scholars. What exactly were you looking for, hmm? Perhaps, (Grabs a book from the shelf behind him) perhaps Dr. Chester Stock&s musings on the Smiledon Californicus?
Guy: Uhh&.
Ross: Ah& Ah&Get out of here! (The couple retreats. Ross starts looking through the previously mentioned book as a beautiful woman walks into the section.) Uh, meeting someone? Or-or are you just here to brush up on Marion&s views on evolution?
Woman: Uh, actually I find Marion&s views far to progressionist.
Ross: I find Marion&s views far to progressionist.
Woman: I&m sorry, who are you?
Ross: I&m a professor here uh, Ross&Geller.
Woman: Ross Geller, why do I know that name? It&s uh&Wait! (Grabs his book off of the shelf.) Did you write this?
Ross: Yes! You&re the person who checked out my book?!
Woman: Y&know, you look nothing like I would&ve thought. You&re&you&re so young.
Ross: Well I uh, I skipped forth grade.
[Time Lapse, Ross and the woman are now in a state of partial undress and are standing in front of the head librarian with two security guards watching them.]
Ross: I am very&very sorry.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Phoebe and Rachel are watching TV as Joey enters.]
Joey: Hey!
Phoebe: Hey!
Rachel: Hi!
Phoebe: So how was, how was your date?
Joey: Oh, it was great! I mean we walked all around the village. We went to this ice cream place, split a milkshake, 70/30 but still& And guess what, I&m thinking about taking her upstate to one of those bed and breakfasts.
Phoebe: Oh really? She said she wants to go away with you?
Joey: No-no-no-no-no! It&s a surprise, but it&s gonna be tricky thought because she said she was gonna be pretty busy at work for a while.
Phoebe and Rachel: Oh no, yeah.
Rachel: Jo-Joey, look honey we-we need to talk okay? Umm, I kinda got the feeling from her today that uh, she&s not lookin& for a serious relationship.
Joey: Where are you gettin& this?
Rachel: Well, she told me. She said she&s kinda a loner.
Joey: Oh. Oh.
Rachel: Joey&
Joey: No hey Rach, it&s cool okay? Y&know I&m a loner too! (Heads for his room.) Right?
Phoebe: Hey Joey, y&know what? You are way to good for her.
Rachel: Yeah and honey I promise next time that I will just say good-bye and tell &em you&re not looking for a relationship.
Joey: No! No. Don&t do that, just next time make sure she really likes me.
Rachel: Well that too. (Joey goes into his room.) Joey?
Joey: Yeah?
Rachel: Do you want some pancakes?
Joey: (coming back out) Finally!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler and Monica are sitting at the kitchen table and are still trying to decide what to do about Janice.]
Monica: What are we gonna do?
Chandler: I say we go with Careless Whisper.
(There&s a knock on the door and Janice enters.)
Janice: Chandler?
Chandler: (To Monica) Did she see us yet? Did she see us?
Monica: Janice, what umm, what are you doing here?
Janice: Well umm, I thought I was going to go back to my apartment but then I just felt I couldn&t really be alone tonight. (Joey walks into view of the open door behind Janice, sees her, gets a terrified look on his face, and flees in horror.) I was wondering if I could maybe stay here with you, just I really feel that I need to be with family.
Monica: (To Chandler) Our kids are gonna call her Aunt Janice aren&t they?
Janice: Please, it&s because otherwise I really don&t know what I might do.
Chandler: Aren&t you just a tinsy bit curious?
Janice: (starting to cry) Do you have any tissues?
Monica: Yeah, in-in-in the bathroom.
Janice: Okay! (She runs for the bathroom)
Monica: We&ll just&we&ll just let her stay.
Chandler: No-no-no-no, if we let her stay, she will stay forever!
Monica: Kinda like your Barca lounger.
Chandler: Is that what you&re thinking about right now?
Monica: I never stop thinking about it.
Janice: Hey you guys, umm do either one of you want to get in there before I take my bath.
Chandler: Janice, I&m sorry but umm, you can&t stay here tonight.
Janice: Why not?
Chandler: Honestly? Our apartment is a hotbed for electromagnetic activity. Now Monica and I have been immunized, but sadly you have not.
(And she does the laugh.)
Janice: Okay, I&m going to need a comforter, but did you have a hypoallergenic one because otherwise I get very nasal. (Makes some weird sound) Do you have a cat? &Cause it&s already happening. (Makes a nasal sound) Do you hear that? (She keeps making the nasal sound.)
(Chandler does the same nasal sound to Chandler.)
Monica: Oh my God! Oh my God! You have to go!
Janice: Why?
Monica: Because Chandler still has feelings for you!
Janice: He does?
Chandler: Say again?
Monica: That&s right. That&s right. And that is why you can&t stay here tonight. And probably why you shouldn&t come to the wedding.
Chandler: Feelings, such strong feelings.
Monica: I mean, I realize that his feelings may never completely go away, but you can.
Janice: Oh&my Gawd, I-I understand. I-I am so sorry, I&ll go. (Starts for the door.) Good-bye Monica (hugs her), I wish you a lifetime of happiness with him. Chandler, (hugs him) you call me when this goes in the pooper. (Hurries out.)
Ending Credits
[Scene: The library&s Paleontology section, Ross is on patrol and stops a security guard through the stack of books.]
Ross: (to the guard) Don&t sweat it, I&ve got this section covered. Yeah, in fact I&ve got this little baby (Turns on a mini-flashlight) to shine in people&s eye&(The guard walks away)&Okay, see you later.
(Ross resumes his patrol when his best friend and sister walk up and start to take off their coats, but they stop when they see him.)
Chandler: I just wanted to show Monica your book. (Ross just glares at him.)
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