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A knot of self-indulgent lunacy: Fang zong feng kuang de jie
A real bastard!: Ge zhen de hun dan!
A switch to those girls' backsides is just good enough: Bian da ta men de bei jiu gou le
Abracadabra-alakazam: Tian-ling-ling, di-ling-ling
Accusing someone of lying, a ridiculous notion, or talking out of the posterior: Fang pi, literally "to break wind"
Act blindly: Bi se yan jing zhuo ma que, literally "try to catch sparrows with one's eyes blindfolded"
Agitate someone out of hiding: Da chow jing ser, literally, "beating the grass to startle the snake"
Aah!: Ai ya!
Alas: Zao gao, literally "spoiled cake"
All talk: Da chong wu dan, literally "big gun, no bullet"
All that is proper: Suo you de dou shi dang
All the planets in space shoved up my butt: Tai kong suo you de xing qiu sai jin wo de pi gu
Alliance: Tong meng
An absolute genius: Zhen de shi tian cai
Are we clear?: Dong le ma
As far as the eye can see: Yi wang wu ji, literally "look afar no bound"
Ass-kicking killer: Xiong can sha shou
Attributing an unfortunate longshot occurrence: Yeh lu jwo duo luh jwohn whei jian gui, literally "do enough nighttime travels and one will eventually see a ghost"; also a warning of future retribution.
Awesome: Gao gan, literally "high pole"
AWOL: Kai xiao chai
Baboon's arse: Fei fei pi gu
Baboon's arse crack: Fei fei de pi yan
Bastard: Hun dan, literally "rotten egg"
Boss or operator of a business: L Lao ban ni'un for a female boss or proprietor's wife. Also informal appellation for acquaintances.
Big Brother, Older Brother: Ge or Ge-Ge, the former is more intimate and connotes a blood relation.
Big stupid pile of stinking meat: Yi dwei da buen chuo roh
Big Sister, Older Sister: Jie or Jei-Jei
Blessing on you: Zhu fu ni
Blindside or conspire against someone secretly: Fahn leong jian, literally "shoot a cold arrow"
Bon Appetit!: Nin chi hao
Boss: Lao ban. Also informal appellation for acquaintances.
Boss (Female): Lao ban ni'un. Also informal appellation for acquaintances.
Bottoms up: Gan bei, literally "dry cup"
Brilliant: Jing cai
Browncoat: Zong yi
Cheap floozy: Jian huo
Check it out, inspect: Jian cha
Check at once: Ma shang jian cha
Cheering or urging someone on: Jia you, literally "add fuel", equivalent of "go (name)!" in English.
Cheers: Gan bei, literally "dry cup"
Chinese/Mandarin language: Jwohn Guo Hua
Come in, enter: Qing jin
Commit blunder of great magnitude: Bie wu long
Complete disarray or sheer pandemonium: Tian fuhn di fu, literally "sky tumbles while earth turns over"
Completely useless: Tian di wu yong
Congratulations: Gong xi
Conniving or scheming person: Gui tou gui nao, literally "ghost head ghost brain"
Consistently useless: Jing-chang mei yong de
Cow Dung: Niu shi
Cow Poop: Niu fen
Cow sucking: Xi niu
Crap: Gou shi
Crap: Zao gao, literally "spoiled cake"
Crazy dog in love with its own feces: Ai chr jze se duh fohn diang gou
Cursing: Ma jung hwa, literally "chastise with dirty words"
Cute: Ke ai ,ass hold
Damn, my god: Ai ya
Damn it: Zao gao, literally "spoiled cake"
Danger/Dangerous: Wei xian
Dangerous person or animal: Wei xian dong wu
Darling: Bao bei
Daydream or wishful thinking: Bai ri meng
Deserving of bad consequence or fate: Hwo gai
Despicable: Kuh wu
Do something for nothing in return, or wasted endeavor without a payoff: Yee yan, literally "a charity show".
Done for: Wan dan, literally "finished (cooked) egg"
Don't worry: Fang xin
Dumbass: Chun, descriptive literally "retarded"
Earthshaking: Jing tian dwohn di, literally "startle the sky and shake the earth"
Empty Threat: Da chong wu dan, literally "big gun, no bullet"
Engage a monkey in a feces-hurling contest: Gen hou zi bi diu shi
Enough of this nonsense: Gou huang tang
Everyone shut up!: Ni men dou bi zui!
Everything under the sky: Tian shia, can be used to allude to the world or the universe
Excrement: Mi tian gong
Explosive diarrhea of an elephant: Da xiang bao zha shi de la du zi
Extraordinarily clever: Gao gan, literally "high pole"
Extraordinarily impatient Buddha: Zhen mei nai xing de Fo zu
Fear nothing but (fill in the blank): Tian bu pa, di bu pa, tze pa...
Fellow: Ja hwo
Female companion or girlfriend: Ma tze, a somew add Dow in front for "looking for a girlfriend"
Filthy fornicators of livestock: He chu-sheng za-jiao de zang-huo!
Fire!: Kai huo (as in shooting), fen huo (as in starting)
Fire at will or terminate with extreme prejudice: Da kai sa jeh, meaning "breaking the Buddhist vow against killing"
Flat-chested: Hur bao dan, slang, literally "eggs cooked sunny-side up"
Foiled or ruined at the last moment: Soh ya fei tian, expression, literally "a cooked duck flies away"
Fool: Sha gua, literally "stupid melonhead", or ben dan, literally "stupid egg"
Friend, pal, buddy: Peng you
Frog-humping son of a bitch: Qing wa cao de liu mang
Fuck!: Ta ma de! (vulgar term)
Gang, crew, or confederate of diehards: Se duhng
Gang or faction leader: Da gher ga for male, da jeh da for female, slang
Garbage: Le se
Get bold or audacious: Fang dan, literally "release courage"
Get lost: Kwai jio kai
Go all out, hold nothing back: Ping ming, literally "fight for one's life"
Go away: Kuai qu hen yuan de di fang, literally "go far away very fast"
Go die: Chui se
Go to hell: Chui se, literally "go die"
God knows what / name of all that's sacred: Tian xiao de
Goddamn monsters: Tian sha de e mo
Good-for-nothing: Bu lang bu you
Good journey or bon voyage: Yi lu shun feng, or yi lu ping an
Good luck: Ju hao yun
Great: Da bian hua, literally "big change"
Greetings: Nihao
Handsome: Shuai
Happy development or fortuitous turn of event: How shi sung chung, literally "a good show's about to start", can be used sarcastically
Have desires above one's social/financial position, or beyond one's ability to realize: Lai huh ma shi yong tze tian e zoh, literally "for a toad to think of eating a swan"
Hell: Gui, literally "ghost"
Hell, underworld: Di yu
Hello: Nihao
Holy testicle (exclamation): Shen sheng de gao wan
Home wrecking tramp: Hu li jing, literally "fox spirit"
Horrible old tyrant: Ke-wu de lao bao jun
Hurry or make haste: Gan mang
I don't believe my eyes!: Wo bu shin wo dah yan jing
I neither see nor hear you: Wo dui ni bu wen bu jian
I'm sorry: Dui bu qi
Idiot: Ben dan, literally "stupid egg", or chun zhu, literally "retarded pig"
Imminent Doom: Wan dan, literally "finished (cooked) egg"
Impossible: Bu ke neng
Impressive display or visage but no substance: Da chong wu dan, literally "big gun, no bullet"
In the doghouse: Leng gong, literally "a cold palace," which is where an emperor confines those concubines who have fallen out of favor
In that case, nevermind: Na mei guan xi
Jerk: Hun dan, literally "rotten egg"
Junk: Fei wu
Just our luck: Zhen dao mei
Kick me in the butt: Ti wo de pi gu
Leader of a criminal operation: She tou, literally "snakehead", derogatory.
Leave one to his own fate: Tze sh'un tze mieh
Let me repeat myself: Wuo jai jeong yi chi
Let's take a deep breath: Yi qi shen hu xi
Life support failure: Shuhn ming shi t'wohn gu jong
Like hell/In your dreams: Jian ta de gui, literally "see his ghost", or jian gui which likely means "seeing ghosts"
Little Brother: Di or Di-Di
Little Sister: Mei or Mei-Mei
Long time no see: Hao joh bu jian
Loopy in the head: Feng le, literally "insane"
Male companion or boyfriend: Kai tze, also a somewhat derogatory slang
Make a big mistake: Bie wu long
Make an example of someone: Sha ji gei hou kan, literally "kill a chicken in front of a monkey"
Merciful Buddha protect us: Ren ci de Fo zu qing bao you wo men
Merciful God, please take me away: Ren ci de shang di, qing dai wo zou
Merciless Bastard: Leng xue za zhong, literally "cold-blooded mixed-breed"
Merciless Hell: Ai ya tian a!
Mind your own business: Guan ni ziji de shi
Miss: xiao jie, literally "little lady." Follows a name when addressing a known person, so River Tam would be addressed as Tam River xiao jie, or simply Tam xiao jie.
Mister: xian sheng, literally "born before me." Follows a name when addressing a known person, so Simon Tam would be addressed as Tam Simon xian sheng, or simply Tam xian sheng.
Monkey raping: Qiang bao hou-zi de
Monkey's butt: Hou-zi de pi-gu
Moron: Ben dan, literally "stupid egg", or chun zhu, literally "retarded pig"
Mother of God: Wo de ma
Mother of God and all her crazy nephews: Wo de ma he ta de fen kuang de wai sheng dou
Motherless goat of all motherless goats: Gao yang zhong de gu yang
Muddled, Mixed-up, Confused: Wu tou wu nao, literally "without a head or a brain"
No problem: Mei wen ti
No way: Cai bu shi
(a) Nobody: Wu ming shao zu, literally "nameless little footsoldier"
Nonsense, rubbish, superfluous words: Fei hua
Not advised: Quan gao bu yi
Not enough: Bu gou, or Hai bu gou for "not enough yet"
Not good: Zao gao, literally "spoiled cake"
Not keeping a rendezvous: Fang ge zi, literally "release a pigeon" but insinuating not picking up the bird at the destination.
Not much of a choice between the two: Ban jin ba liang
Nothing ventured, nothing gained: Bu ru hu xue yan de hu zi, literally "how can you catch tiger cubs without entering the tiger's lair"
Now, immediately: Ma shang
Nuts: Shiang Jing Ping, or just Shiang J Fah Shiang Jing for "going nuts"
Nuts: Kuang zhe de, literally "crazy"
Oddball or Goof: Chai Neow
Of course: Dang ran
Oh, this is a happy development: O, zhe zhen shi ge kuai le de jin zhan
Oh God, no: Lao tian, bu
Oh my God: Wo de tian a
Old friend: Lao peng you
Old man / husband: Lao gong
Old lady / wife: Lao po
One must be ruthless to be great: Wu du bu zhong fu, literally "a person without poison is not a great man"
Out of touch with reality: Bi mu se ting, "shut one's eyes and stop up one's ears"
Outdo someone or doing one better: Dao-gao-yee-chi moh-gao-yee-juhn, expression, literally "the solution advances a yard, the problem advances a mile"
Over my dead body: Chu fei wo si le
Pal: Lao xiong, "old chap", between male friends
Panda urine: Xiong mao niao
Paranoid, extremely suspicious: Bei gong she ying, literally "mistaking the reflection of a bow in the cup for a snake"
Pathetic wretch: Bei bi xiao ren, literally "shameless little dirty person"
Peon: Wu ming shao zu, literally "nameless little footsoldier"
Petty: Suo xi
Prehistoric: Lao Diu Ya, literally "so old as to lose all teeth"
Pig's Sty: Zhu fuen chse
Pile of sun-baked dog poo: Ri shao gou shi bing
Plain, bland, bare: Yong chwen mien, slang taken from the namesake generic, flavorless noodle dish.
Please be quiet: Qing an jing yi dien
Pool of Excrement: F'n Zse
Pool of pig droppings: Zhu fuen chse
Posterior, bottom, butt: Pi gu
Precious: Bao bei
Real man, manly man, gentleman: Nan zi han
Really Dangerous: Wei xian, more poetic, wo hu chung long, which is "crouching tiger, hidden dragon" and expression for something dangerous.
Remorseless harridan: Bu hui hen de po fu
Retreat, run away: Jio weh sung chiuh, phrase summarizing the last of the Chinese "36 Stratagems", which extols the virtue of fleeing to fight another day.
Ridiculously strange, illogical or nonsensical: Mo ming qi miao, literally "not understanding the peculiarity"
Ruined, finished: Wan dan le
Ruthless or savage beast of a person: Ching soh
Scoundrel: Huai dan, literally "bad egg"
Screw him/her running: Gun ta jwo lu
Screw you: Qu ni de
Shameless Hussy: Meh lian duh jyah ji, literally "faceless bastard prostitute"
Shiny, awesome, fantastic: Jahn!
Shit on my head! (or another expletive): Ai ya, huai le!
Shut up: Bi zui
Shut up (as in, 'Get out' or 'yeah right'): Hu che
Shut up, all of you!: Ni men dou bi zui!
Shut up and make us wealthy: Bi zui, rong wo men fa cai
Shut up, you inconsiderate schoolboys!: Bi zui, nin hen bu ti tie de nan sheng!
Sir: Da yeh. When used as a nobility, Nuhn Jwei, following the name.
Small fry: Wu ming shao zu, literally "nameless little footsoldier"
Smelled a fart: Wen guo pi
So guilty as to deserve a thousand deaths: Jwei gai wang se
SOB: Wang ba dan, or gou neong yung de for a more literal and vicious translation.
Speak now and quickly: Yo hua kuai so
Speaking without a clue: Xia hua, literally "blind talk"
Splendid: Jing cai
Stop talking: Ju kou
Stubborn disciplinarian: Pian zhi de jie cha yuan
Stupid: Yu ben de
Stupid son of a drooling whore and monkey: Liu kou shui de biao zi he hou zi de ben er zi
Stupid inbred sack of meat: Ben tian sheng de yi dui rou
Sweetheart: Bao bei
Swindle: Guai
Suicidal idea: Zu sha zhu yi
Surrender, give up: Tou xiang
Take care, stay healthy: Bao zhong, literally "maintain weight"
Talk nonsense: Shia suo
Teacher: Lao shi
Thanks: Xie xie
There's nothing in this plan that isn't horrific: Zhe ge ji hua zhen ke pa
Things never go smooth: Hao yun bu lai, huai yun bu jwo, literally "good luck don't come, bad luck don't leave"
Time out!: Yi qi shen hu xi, literally "Let's take a deep breath"
To throw in a monkey wrench: Gwai ma jiao, literally "twist a horse's legs (while it's galloping)"
Too bad: Zao gao, literally "spoiled cake"
Trouble, problem, complication: Ma fan
Troublemaker: Wan nao
Tyrant, iron-fisted ruler: Ba wang
Ugly or perverted person: Zhu Bajie, insult taken from the name of the hoggish, lecherous character in the popular Chinese folktale, "Journey to the West"
Understand: Dong, dong ma for "understand?" dong le ma for "are we clear here?"
Unnecessarily complicating something, or overdoing it: Hua she tian zu, literally "draw a snake and add feet to it"
Urine-soaked demons (or something to the effect): Niao shi de du-gui
Very: Fei chang
Violent lunatic: Xiong meng de kuang ren
Vixen: Hu li jing, literally "fox spirit"
Wah!: Wa, an exclamation. (Does NOT mean the sound of vomiting, as some have suggested.)
Wait/hold on a second: Deng yi miao
Warning someone against doing things 'the hard way': Jing zhou bu chi chi fa zhou, literally "choosing to sip the wine of penalty over that of respect"
Watch your back: Zhen ta ma yao ming. Zhu yi. Literally "this is pretty damned dangerous. Pay attention"
Water: Shui
We will enjoy your silence now: Bai tuo, an jing yi dian
We're in big trouble: Ai ya wo men wan le
Weak-ass sauce: Lan dan jiang, literally "rotten egg sauce"
What?: Shen me
What is that?: Na shi shen me?
What is this?: Zhe shi shen me?
What a mess: Zao gao, literally "spoiled cake"
What is this garbage?: Zhe shi shen me lan dong xi?
Whores in hell!: Ta shi suo you di yu de diao zi de ma!, literally "she is the mother of all prostitutes in hell"
Whores of SOBs: Wang ba dan de biao zi
Wonderful!: Pai an jiao jue, literally "slap the table and shout with praise"
Yes, affirmative: Shi a
You don't deserve it: Ni bu ying de zhe ge, or Ni bu gou ge
You fink/wretch/etc: Ni hun qiu
You want a bullet right in your throat?: Ni yao wo kai qiang
You wanna die?: Ni zhao si ma?
You're all idiots: Ni men dou shi sha gua, literally "all of you are foolish"
Young one: Nian qing de, or ying chi, slang for underaged (literally "infant teeth")}